Let's Get it Done!

I am sitting in the office of a director of a major hotel in Irvine. She is savvy business women who has graciously welcomed time with me to discuss Zen's Purple Garden. On the cork board behind her is a post card that stands out "Do or Don't. There is no TRY." I comment how I like the post card. I am a firm believer in committing to something in life, or not, and following through. She agrees and shares about aspects of her job that require following through, even when you don't want to. We get that we honor deadlines, do what we say, commit. We exchange a look of recognition of someone who has integrity, someone who is trustworthy.

Later, I see the news. Obama has declared about health care "Let's get it done!"
I agree. I don't know all the details of the reform, but I get that it is a step forward, not perfect, not without gaps, but a step forward. I do get his commitment to the best possible bill with "what's so" right now. As I watched clips of the health care conference last week I sighed with exasperation at the antics of the opposing members, turning the conference into a battleground of analogies and jabbing words versus honoring the time carefully created to CREATE.

As a Mom and business person, as a wife creating a life with my husband of ten years, I am constantly getting things done. I am doing doing doing. There are days in which I take my often protesting, screaming baby in and out of the car seat, bringing my older boys to school, to errands, grocery shopping, to play dates or doctors, over twelve times. And that's just the car seat, that's not the highchair or diaper changing table. I bend, lift, squat, clean, reach, scrape food, wipe butt, sweep, scrub, cook, blot, dab, put away, wash, fold, pack, remind, direct, ask, command, walk, pick up, drop off, console, cuddle, pat, tuck, dress and hug, countless times during the day. I get it Done! Moms do.

And yet with all that doing, I rarely take time to think about who I am being...what is my experience of myself? Who am I to my children? To my husband? Do they enjoy being around me? Does my husband really look forward to coming home? Does he just like to come home to get away from work? Or to be with Me?

When I can take my mind off auto pilot and stop just doing doing doing...I look into their eyes and get what all the doing is about. What REALLY matters. And that's not what I am doing for them. It's who I am being with them.

Tonight, my husband looks at me with gratitude and sweetness in his eyes and requests that my sons tell me that I am amazing after a good dinner and bonding conversation, ( I love him:). My 4 year old looks at me and says "Momma, you are really really really really really reeeeeeeeeeally amazing!", and I get that it's not because of the cooking, picking up an dropping off, cleaning, packing lunches or bedtime tucking in. Being there and doing those thing is great, the health care conference was a good idea, but who I am being, who they are being about it, makes all the difference in the world.

When I let Bodee help cook and guide his hand gently, even when he makes a mess, or when I commit to being on time to drop off and pick up and I am, with a peaceful smile, (huge breakthrough for me, I used to always be late)...or when I hum lullabye, even when I am dog tired, and Thank God for all the beautiful things in nature, for my boys, with love and gratitude in my off key song...being patient and trustworthy, being love...I have a feeling that that might be what he appreciates so much.
Or it could be that I get what really matters to him and I buy him a pack of gum now and then...who knows.

My point is Getting it Done is great. Let' s do that. But let's also think about who we are being please, Congressmen and women. What are you creating and who are you being about that? People's lives are on the line and this mother cares about people having access to health care to take care of their families, and be healthy, now.
Thank you.

Zen Honeycutt
www.zenspurplegarden.com