Thursday, December 8, 2011

Smart Ass

My three year old is a Smart Ass. I think we all may start out like that for a while, but he is hanging on to it.
He knows the alphabet, but instead he taunts me with "y,y,y,z,z,z!!!!" He knows the color is green, but instead, when asked, he smiles coyly at me and says happily, "PINK!"
My paranoid mother brain projects him in psych class in college. He will be the one, when asked for an essay on "What is self examination?" that answers with one sentence "Why did you ask me this?".

I know really, I have nothing to worry about, but you know, I am a Mom and sometimes I do. What if my kid fails just because he doesn't care about succeeding?

What if my kid is really smart but just doesn't give a rat's ass about other people knowing it?

What if learning is not about being able to regurgitate it in a way that pleases everyone else?

Wait when I think about that, that is pretty awesome. Google would not exist of the creators were concerned with showing what they had learned in a way that other people expected. No they created, and did what they loved, and THEN people go it.
They took what they learned and transformed it, they didn't spit it out exactly as everyone else would have.
THAT's the kind of learning I want to encourage. I will continue to ask Bronson and my older boys to write beyond what the teachers expect them to do, to use their knowledge for whatever THEY want. When I think about it that way, I have peace and faith and even excitement about whatever they create...
Why not have learning be fun?

I learn from my kids constantly. So today, I am taking on being a Smart Ass today in the most fun way...saying things people least expect, expressing myself in a FUN way, letting go of concern about what others think and transforming what I learn into something new.
How about you?

Zen Honeycutt

Tuesday, December 6, 2011


In between those times when something is supposed to happen, I am still living my life. I am still a Mom when I am waiting for the teller to count out a stack of ones for the most-likely-a-waitress in front of me. I am still a Mom when we are driving to the library. I am still a Mom when I forget something in the car and we all have to tromp back through the chilly air, between minivans, all the way through the parking lot and get it.

It's those in-between moments that I realized yesterday, that are still open to the creation of miracles.
Yea, the big moments, baby Christenings and weddings and birthdays are easy to see as miraculous. But if I am in the market for an extraordinary, miraculous life (which I am), causing a miracle while waiting for my soup to cool, now that is the real deal.

It seems like causing miracles might take alot of energy doesn't it? Well first let's define that a miracle is something that you never ever expected would happen, something that never would have happened anyway and something that creates profound, relatedness, love, wonder...that's MY definition of a miracle. You can make up yours. By the way, in my world, God isn't the only one who causes them, he/she/God gave us free will to cause our lives. That includes miracles too:) And when we are present and just living, causing miracles can be easy and joyful.

Yesterday I created with my accountability buddy (we have calls daily or at least 3X a week) that I was committed to causing Miraculous Relatedness. That includes everyone everywhere and everything. It includes my new and profound commitment to be a YA best selling author in partnership with my husband. That is a future that has me excited, not only about the future, but it has me being excited RIGHT NOW. And being present, living, having fun.

On the way to the library to pick up some YA novels that I have been remiss to read, (cuz ya know I don't "need" arrogant, my ego:) and hook the kids up with some fun books, I turned on the radio and began clapping and dancing to the music. I invited the kids join in and shared with them "If you ever have a choice to sit down or dance, I hope you choose dance,dance, dance!" And they did. They busted the moves the whole way to the library.

Then when I forgot my drivers liscense in the car (to get a library card at this new library, we just moved, that's another blog) and we have to go back through the long lot, I used the normally tedious redo-moment to create miraculous relatedness with my sons. I asked Ben what he was thinking and he said,"Mom I would suggest that this library not have toliets that are so big."
"Oh really? Did you almost fall in?" I said with wide eyes.
"YES! The seat is too big." Major injustice!!
"What would happen if you fell in???" I asked like we were discovering a National Treasure.
"My butt would get wet." he said.
"Yes, but I mean, if you got flushed...what would happen?" he looked at me oddly and then smiled and made a face.
"I would go into the sewer, Yeeech!"
"Ewwww... what would that be like?"
"You would get eaten by a CROCODILE!" shouted Bodee, my slime loving six year old.
"Would you be tasty?" I asked.
Ben shook his head, smiling crookedly at me. "Nooooo..."
"Why NOT? I asked. "I feed you yummy food!" and tickled him.

He threw his head back and laughed a full belly laugh. I grabbed at Bodee and Bronson for good measure, and suddenly we had retrieved the driver's liscense and we on our way back to the library. Full of fun, happy and connected, my sons and I had images and laughing we never would have had if I had just been grumpy because I forgot somthing and "had to" drag them to the car and back. A "waste of time" was transformed into a miraculous moment of imagination and relatedness.

Cooling soup might actually be the inspiration for a children's book set on a planet with soup for seas. The bank might be the time we create the "Allowance Deal" that has the kids lit up about saving.
Miraculously, at the end of the day, we sat around as a family reading and the kids drew these amazing cartoon books. Ben's was an ode to me, a Mom he loves "EVRYWARE", with images of me doing all kinds of things for the family. Bodee's was a book about "Banana Boomerang." Gold mine of imagination, right there. And Bronson drew pictures of Piglet that look like adorable amoeba. The tears of joy and relatedness I feel are miraculous.

I write this to remind myself, to sprinkle into the world, that those in-between moments are just as big as the big moments. It's all what we make them. I am causing a Miraculous life...won't you cause a miracle today? That's a world I want to raise my children in..a future I am excited to live into...aren't you???

With Love and Joy
Zen Honeycutt